Welcome to a new series where I curate some of my favourite articles, twitter threads and essays from the past month. December’s list is obviously a little belated but I still wanted to share these amazing pieces. Going forward I’m going to aim to get these out on the last weekend on the month.
Three Thoughts on Emotional Labour by Clementine Morrigan
Read It Here: http://gutsmagazine.ca/emotional-labour
As someone who does a lot of emotional labour on and off the clock, the three questions raised in this piece (Is it consensual? Is it valued? Is it reciprocated?) are really useful for me to come back to when giving or receiving it. Emotional labour has developed unhealthy connotations in many spaces but it is such a vital and valuable part of the human experience. It just needs to happen under the correct circumstances.
Sex Nerd Reading List by Elle Chase
Elle Chase is a goddess. If you haven’t read her book, Curvy Girl Sex, walk away from your device right now and grab a copy right now – it’s amazing! My sex book library is pretty expansive so new stuff is sometimes hard to come by, so I was very excited to find a few titles that I still don’t have. It has a great mix of subject areas and will suite fledgling sex nerds and old hands alike.
Sex Work Reality Thread by @YEVGEN1YA
Read It Here: https://twitter.com/YEVGEN1YA/status/942091051887710208
Make Them Leave by Jamie Loftus
You Need Help: Here Is A Worksheet To Help You Talk To Partners About Sex posted by A.E. Osworth on Autostraddle
They cover specific acts but also include topping/bottoming and giving/receiving preferences, encourage safety discussions about toys and lubes, explore the creativity of sex and sexuality, promotes conversation about language for both safety and gender reasons, allow you to share fantasies and establish boundaries. There is also a cute venn diagram to fill in all your interests so you can see what you and your partner share.
I think these are really great tools to fill out alone or with new/existing partners (either together, perhaps over brunch – or alone and then swapped) as a starting point for an exciting exploration. I’m all for giving people the tools to empower themselves and these are excellent tools. ;P